How
to pick up a broad:
Ok now listen up chumps. Back in my day when we wanted to
meet a dame we did it in a bar and we used our skills as
men to do it. We didn’t have the internet and those match
making websites to help us out either. We did it the old
way. We walked up to a broad and talked the poodle skirt
right off of her.
Of course this was before those lesbians in the 70’s
started burning their bras and forgetting their place in
the pecking order, but they are all the same so pay
attention. Anyway, old Charlie is going to give you guys
the straight dope and maybe help some of you pathetic
palookas in the chick department.
There are a million and one places to meet women nowadays
and knowing how to go about it and makes all the difference
in the world. Whether its at the local watering hole, or in
the produce section of the supermarket, Charlie is going to
school you in taking down your prey.
At the bar: If she is with a covey of other betties, take a
note from the lion’s playbook of the successful kill and
lay off until you can take her alone and without the
protection of the other ladies. Next, try to see if she had
spotted you and try to gauge her interest. A simple look
from her is enough. If she doesn’t see you, no biggie, just
move in, don’t be a goof about it.
Avoid cheesy pickup lines, they don’t work. Here’s what you
say: “Hi I’m Charlie, can I buy you a drink.” (Use your
name though.) This old classic works and since you are
already in a bar, it’s a 50/50 whether she will accept. If
she thinks you are a creep you will know it.
Next, establish some rapport with light conversation. Ask
her name, where’s she’s from, what she does. Once you get
the ball rolling, throw her a compliment, dames dig that a
bunch, “You have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.”
After this its cream town.
Now that things are going swell, make your move to get
those digits. First, since you are a classy cat, you have a
business card on you. Simply hand it to her, and tell her
to call you sometime. Ask her the best way to get in touch
with her and write it down…you got a pen don’t you chump?
That’s it. Your done. After the successful exchange, go
back to your corner and wait for her to walk into your web.
If you are too pushy right off the bat and you try to hard
to get her bloomers off, she will spook unless she is a
randy little vixen, then you are in like Flynn.
Remember these tips:
-No cheesy lines.
-Always have some cards on you, it will make you look like
you got it together.
-Never ask for her number, instead ask her the best way to
get in touch with her.
-Be confident.
-You don’t care if she blows you off.
-Get her alone. Never approach a team of broads, they will
shred you into bits.